Have you ever decided to make a change, and have you made it a New Year’s Resolution? And this time you decided to really go all the way and make the changes only to find that you – yet again – slipped off the trail. And this time you really had everything in place! Or at least so you thought…
I like to make plans; actually I have liked them my entire life! If the initial plan wouldn’t work, then I’d make another plan, more comprehensive, more appealing, more detailed etc. Of course, this plan too would be broken in the shortest time… and then again, I’d go back to the drawing board. At some point I had a revelation: people make plans to just have what to do! And it really was a time when I believed that plans are something you do just to have what to break. Like setting rules you then joyously break, asserting your freedom to change your mind. No need to say what age I was then!
As time passed I felt less the need to assert anything, I started being concerned with being true to myself, without confining myself under any label – just knowing that I’ll always make the best decision based on the information I would have. And if I had more information, I might make a different decision next time… And that’s alright too!
I believe we impose upon ourselves far too strict rules and when we cannot meet them, we judge ourselves harshly and incessantly. We are far better when we realize that we might want to experience abundance, just because we’ve seen so far how it was without it; and we want to experience health, since we’ve already seen how it is not having it – and this fully knowing, acknowledging and realizing that the curiosity for what’s on the other side will never – nor is it intended to – stop or disappear.
This curiosity is the motivation that allows us to change constantly. We are not the person we were a couple of months ago, let alone a few years back! We do change based on the experiences we had, on the interests we have pursued and the dreams we focus on. And just because these changes are happening at the unconscious level, we usually are not even aware of them and then when we want to make a change consciously, we automatically put so much pressure on it as if we’d not know how to do it… we expect it to be hard… and therefore it is!
This brings me to a very dear topic: our perception and it’s pivotal influence on our entire reality. We can perceive something to be true and for us it is the truth and the whole truth. However since our brain has the capacity to process only a fraction of all that happens around us every moment, “the truth” is merely our own truth. And there are a multitude (not to say an infinity) of truths that all are valid and real, and that we are unaware of. No one truth can be better than another one, or superior or exclusive. All these truths are coexisting and we will do us a favour to acknowledge this. The less involved we are in the need of being right, the more fluidity, coherence and flow we allow in our lives.
Therefore, whether or not we make a decision to change, just be assured that the opportunities for learning will present themselves regardless, and therefore we will change continuously anyway. As my hypnosis teacher always says: “you’re done when you’re dead!”. There is no other way: the entire Universe is designed to expand and us too! And we do it with or without being aware of it happening.
Now, if you want to have control over your life, you might want to decide to design your life, to make conscious changes, to set goals, milestones etc. The key to this is to really make the decision, meaning to be prepared to do whatever it takes to achieve your goal, as long as it’s ecological, ethical and in the best interest of all involved. This is not for everyone – only for those who feel an immense urge and need to take into their own hands how/what happens in/with their lives. You will still have to learn – mind you – however you might just decide to learn easily and effortlessly….
So next time we decide to make a New Year’s Resolution, it might help to know that we need to engage some discipline and be prepared to do whatever it takes. Change does happen instantly only at the unconscious level and it happens anyway without us interfering consciously. However when we want to design that change, then it is originated consciously and there’s a bit more work to be done. As long as we know that and prepare for it, there’s no limit to what we can achieve (as long as we can imagine it, but that’s another exciting topic)!